Breaking hearts

Saying goodbye to someone you love is one of the most painful things to go through.

Whether it comes as a shock, or something that you’ve been expecting for some time, nothing prepares you for the all consuming grief that bites into your very core.

It’s something I’m bracing for. Something I don’t want to do.

Our darling dog’s heart is literally breaking. She’s got heart failure. The vets have confirmed we’ll most likely have to say goodbye to her within months. But we don’t know how many.

She should be rattling with the nine pills she needs to take every day. We can’t really take her for the walks she loves. We can’t let her chase those pesky rabbits she dreams of catching.

Every day we have left with her is something to treasure. She’s a very happy, pampered pooch, who doesn’t seem to understand she’s ill. She doesn’t look it either. Yet she’s breaking from the inside out.

Even though we know it’s coming, I still dread the day we have to make a decision. Or the doggy Gods make it for us.

I can’t imagine not having a bouncy, waggy, furry welcome home hug.

I can’t imagine vacuuming the carpet and not having pesky white dog hairs contaminating it within minutes.

I can’t imagine not having a four legged ride along on lengthy campervan trips.

But one day, not too far away, I’ll have to. Then my heart will break too.